he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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