How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
And then he peed in my hair
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize