yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
