Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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