he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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