Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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