Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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