I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
accomplished twins. life is a go
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
