I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Randomize
