We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I'm at about main and main street
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
