Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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