His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Im part way to drunk.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
