how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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