508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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