Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
