All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
When are your genitals available?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize