last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
found the other keg... it's in the tree
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
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Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
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Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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