yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
