Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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