please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
