this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
