you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
