He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
