She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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