making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
