I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just cut my nipple shaving
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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