it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
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crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
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Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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