To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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