I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize