Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
