This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
