Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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