Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
