hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize