Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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