what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize