sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Randomize
