Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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