Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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