girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
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and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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