I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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