she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
How naked do you want me to be?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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