It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
