if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.