Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
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she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
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I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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