I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
