508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
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Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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