He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
We got so high we made milksteak
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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