do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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