Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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